Going into the project, I did not know what to expect. I did not have any objective assumptions about the work I was doing. So, in theory, my experience is not necessarily out of my expectations. One thing that did surprise me, however, is how often I work in solitude. I did not expect so much of my work to be unsupervised. On a typical day, I wake up, go straight to my clerical work updating our spreadsheets, and then wait for applicants to apply. I do not have as many meetings or as many check-ins with my boss when I first started. While I am more than capable of doing the work alone, sometimes those daily interactions helped make my days more fulfilling.
My feelings may be because I have never had a true internship, so I did not know what my tasks would look like. Or it can be attributed to the way my particular organization operates. Either way, I definitely expected to have more hands-on interactions with my coworkers.
I would not say this is a change, more just something that slightly surprised me. I have responded to this by taking initiative. I meet with or Google Chat my coworkers if I need their help and to ensure I am on the right path. I remind myself that the only way they can know I am struggling, is if I verbalize it. Because they have their own jobs to do and cannot read minds, they would have no other way of knowing I need help. As for my personal growth, I need to remind myself that asking for help is okay. I often struggle with this, but I need to swallow my pride and reach out to others when I am wavering. My coworkers have made it clear that they are always available to help. In terms of resiliency, I do not even see this as an incident I “recover” from, for it is not a bad thing to ask for assistance. Instead, I see it as an opportunity to get to know myself and my coworkers in moments of uncertainty.